I was reported for gender misconduct for calling myself handsome in class

I was reported for gender misconduct for calling myself handsome in class
Outrageous! "One somber autumn morning, I took the opportunity to call myself handsome in Chinese. Wǒ hěn shuài, I uttered in my unchecked malevolence and without care for cultural norms or general moral principles. I know you must be too aghast to read on at this point, but please, bear with me, so that this kind of horrific statement never sees the light of day again." ... “Even if I agree with you, I obviously couldn’t say anything…”